Peace Before Sunset

By T.Pat Cavanaugh

I WROTE THIS A FEW YEARS AGO IN ARIZONA. I HOPE THAT IT WILL HELP YOU IN SOME WAY

I accept the fact finally that I am getting older, I have been fighting hard not  to be like my grandparents and parents and spend most of my  time reading the Obituaries and  talking about how  their friends who were passing away at an alarming rate.

It seems now I have become them, in the last three weeks I have lost two of my friends and associates I cared a great deal about.

First was Bob Childress who worked his way up in the newspaper business along with me, we knew each other for 35 years. His children and my children hung out together as they traveled with us to the many newspaper conventions we attended.

Bob and I both were Circulation Directors and when the company he worked for purchased more newspapers he was promoted to one of their new ones  and I took his place as the Circulation Director of that companies flagship newspaper, from there I was promoted to publisher, my life long dream. Bob was always in my corner.

I felt good that after a championship fight for his life that failed, I was able to give him and his family advice on choosing Hospice care in order for him to receive the peace and comfort and dignity he deserved.

I flew back to Virginia to be of help to his family and I was honored to do his eulogy, I thought I would weep as I talked about his accomplishments and our friendship, but I could only smile. Bob, when times were tough  would always tell me he was going to open up a Hot Dog stand, as soon as he came up with the right chili, well Bob, I know you have your hotdog stand now, I will be looking forward to checking out that chili someday.

My other friend was Butch Walker his daughter called me last week, to tell me died peacefully, for a fighter I know he was at peace to die so peacefully.

Butch was my editor in San Diego through his leadership our paper became the paper of choice for every journalism major that graduated from San Diego State.

Butch and I would have terrific battles on style, substance and my editorial beliefs, I gave into his style and substance and he finally accepted my editorial ideas, we had a partnership of mutual respect.

Butch went on to purchase a small community newspaper in Iowa, he and his wife Dianne lived in an apartment above their paper. The town is small the paper never changed but the townspeople loved him, they just recently had a fundraiser to help him and his wife, help  pay the horrific medical bills that he had mounted up, also fighting the  same  awful cancer that  killed Bob

Butch also was in Hospice, I was relieved that they both went on to their personal sunset in peace

Butch loved the Dallas Cowboys I on the other hand loved the Washington Redskins.

This past Sunday they played each other, Butch I want you to know I got a Dallas Cowboy hat and I rooted for them Pokes just for you, it wasn’t easy and I shed a few tears, but it was worth it. I can still hear you laughing. I didn’t have to pay off any bets this time.

I know my friend’s families know now that having been a part of Hospice gave them the opportunity to be part of their Dads and Grandpas life. The final act of their life which was spent in comfort, gave them the time to share their hopes their dreams and their lives with everyone who loved them.

You need to understand that Hospice is not a place, it’s an ideal, its alive with hope and joy and of courses a little sadness, its we make of it.

As a patient, Hospice brings you a chance to control your own life in the end of your time just as you always have in the past, for the families, Hospice provides you and opportunity to be a total part of your loved ones life past and present and to share a love that will be engrained in your heart forever.

Turning over your care to a well trained and caring staff at a Hospice, doesn’t mean that you are willing to give up, it means that you accept the fact that you have a disease that will take you from your loved ones quicker than you had attended to and that you want to spend the rest of your time here on earth enjoying your life, enjoying your family enjoying being able to be at peace when you are ready to travel into your own sunset.

If you would like to know more about what I have just written about call your local Hospice there is one located in social circle and one in Rockdale County.

Until next time.

.